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Author Topic: Power Rankings - Olympic Edition  (Read 498 times)

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Offline GypsieDeathBringer

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Power Rankings - Olympic Edition
« on: January 07, 2022, 05:58:32 PM »
Sorry these power rankings have been cancelled due to Covid.  I'm not trying to get quarantined for 5 weeks in China.

On another note though I would like it if teams didn't keep changing.  I get it that new GMs might not want that team, but I literally have no clue what team has what players.  It is probably the biggest reason I don't do Power Rankings more often.

On a separate note here are the power rankings:

1. St. Louis Blues (20-2)  -  They have slowly been creeping up on the Coyotes had just so happen to have eclipsed them for points scored this week.  Draisaitl was going for a goal a game average and then the Oilers powerplay stopped scoring at a 50% clip.  This team probably has the current Norris front runner in Hedman, current Rocket Richard leader in Draisaitl, Vezina leader in Saros and 100% without a doubt this year's Conn Smythe winner Phil Kessel.  Coyotes are going all the way this year!

2. Arizona Coyotes (21-1) -  Sorry I was mixing up the NHL Coyotes with our DNHL Coyotes.  These Coyotes are soul crushing.  I didn't think they would be so good this year.  Mainly because I didn't want them to be this good.  The oldest player in their main group of 20 players is 26 year old Tony DeAngelo.  They have 9 players on rookie contracts getting over 2 pts/g.  Why couldn't Covid attack the young and healthy?
   
3 - Washington Capitals (17-5)  -  Ovechkin hasn't just turned back the clock he has invented a whole new clock.  The kind of clock that never gets hurt.  The kind of clock that runs on coca-cola.  The kind of clock that breaks the record of some old over fawned over Canadian guy.  I'm also glad I traded Johnny Gaudreau for a guy who hasn't played hockey in almost 2 years.  I'm so good at this fantasy hockey stuff. 
   
4. Pittsburgh Penguins (17-5)  -  Jack Eichel, the least entertaining version of will they or won't they with his neck surgery.  Hopefully he comes back and destroys in Vegas or I will have made very many mistakes.  Troy Terry has been a revelation on an exciting NHL Ducks team.  Watching Guentzel and Rust score in the NHL should give hope to every 5' 8" white man.  If they can do it why can't you?  Or, you know, your slightly more athletic brother.
   
5. Buffalo Sabres (14-8) -  Marcus Foligno has now gone almost an entire NHL season shooting 27% if you combine last year and this.  That is absurd.  I don't watch any Wild games, but I assume he must just be grabbing the puck and running it into the net like a running back scoring a touchdown.  Only took the NHL Oilers 5 years, but they figured out that Puljujarvi should be playing on the top 2 lines as a scoring winger.  My god they are stupid, and not in the funny kind of way, but in the kind of way where you waste prime years of generational talent.
   
6. Seattle Kraken (17-5) - How far can a team go with basically no goalie support in this league? 5th place in the real rankings, but only 6th place in the power rankings.  These Kraken are doing a reverse Coyote employing the over 33 years old gang in Letang, Crosby, Bergeon, Getzlaf, Erik Johnson, Oshie and Pacioretty.  I know what you are thinking, Reverse Coyote, that sounds sexual.  Nothing sexier than something that involves Greiss (Thomas) around your Brown (Dustin).
   
7. Philadelphia Flyers (12-10)  -  A real tough luck bunch here.  Their points scored indicate they should be an easy playoff team, but they will be fighting hard to get in through the Patrick Division. Getting Malkin back should provide a big boost, but loosing Stamkos to a freak leg injury.  Oh that hasn't happened yet?  Give it a couple of weeks when the NHL Lightning need cap space.  A true team first player that guy.
   
8. New York Islanders (14-8) - Ilya Sorokin is the real deal.  Unfortunately for him the NHL Islanders keeping signing players to contracts that make you do a double look and say "Is that really the deal"?  Kahkonen looks like he'll be getting a long look now that Talbot is injured and he has played well with 6 out of his last 8 games giving up 2 goals or fewer.  I want everyone to take a moment to look at William Nylander's picture on Fantrax.  His face looks like someone forgot they could put features anywhere, but the very center of a head.  It is disturbing.
   
9. Boston Bruins (9-13)  -  Imagine if you will a lynx jumping through the branches of a tree with grace and composure.  In this league that is the Blues.  Now imagine some parachuting in way to fast over top the same tree and just hitting every single branch.  Getting snagged and pulled every which way, never able to get out of its own way. That is the Bruins.  They should also be a playoff team, but will be crossing all their phalanges for luck to get in.
   
10. Winnipeg Jets (10-12) - It is almost sad to see Patrick Kane still have so much hockey to give, but playing for a team that can do nothing with it.  Almost as sad as not having the conviction to stick up for teammates when they need a superstar's ability to enact cultural change in a team.  But, you know, they won some Stanley Cups.  Guess it was worth it. 
   
11.  Columbus Blue Jackets (11-11)  - Cale Makar is sensational if you like 6-5 hockey games, which I do, but it is going to be tough in the playoffs for the NHL Avs.  These DNHL Blue Jackets are also going to have a tough time getting the playoffs.  They need more from Kuemper and for Wheeler and Couturier to get back soon.

12. Toronto Maple Leafs (13-9) - Niolaj Ehlers seems to get so little praise.  He is always just under 30 goals a year, so he doesn't have that cache.  He just never gets enough ice/power play time to rise to that next level.  Probably why the NHL Jets couldn't either. 


The "Nah nah nah nah" Next Yearrrrr... Group

Montreal could still certainly make the playoffs, but with their points scored vs what everyone above them scores it seems daunting. 
   
13. Montreal Canadiens (12-10)  -  Kucherov is coming back and that might be just enough to sneak into the 10 spot.  Vasilevskiy and Demko will keep them in it until the last weeks.
   
14. Chicago Blackhawks (8-14)  -  Only going to get worse from here.
   
15. Edmonton Oilers (7-15) - Connor McDavid is still here.  If that isn't a golden ticket for something than I don't know what is.  Time to cash in that ticket.
   
16. New York Rangers (6-16)  -  Has some real good players in Kreider, Nelson, Johansen, Markov to build around.  In the real NHL that would be great, but in DNHL you need loads of stars.  Will need Kupair and Zach Jones to be stellar.
   
17. Vancouver Canucks (6-16)  -  A nasty net combination of Knight, Askarov and Dostal.  2024 can't come soon enough.
   
18. Vegas Golden Knights (5-17) -  Maybe the trade deadline sparks some more trades, but anyway this team has some nice pieces that could be moved to facilitate a full rebuild.
   
19. Ottawa Senators (1-21) -  Should be real deep at defense with Cal Foote, Luke Hughes, Sanderson, and Jake Bean leading the charge for years to come.
   
20. Detroit Red Wings (0-22) -  Really like all their goalie prospects. If there was every a way to get back on the top it is to start in the rear.

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Offline Rob

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Re: Power Rankings - Olympic Edition
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2022, 10:45:18 AM »
Most excellent.  I'm glad my bedraggled crew was mentioned in the same sentence as the Blues!
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