Still going by "Fantasy Points For"
1. Blackhawks (3-1) still top dog - A perfect example of how you can win in spite of someone. *cough*steve mason*sneeze* If I was as bad as he is at my job they'd send me to the minors (unemployment)
2. Hurricanes (2-2) previous 5th - Still working out the cost, but it is time to put Eric Staal's picture on the back of milk cartons. A -16 in 14 games with 5 points, a cardboard cutout of Staal could perform better (that's what his wife said).
3. Bruins (2-2) previous 8th - Just like I predicted the Bruins are on the rise. Tim Thomas is a freak. They are going to start selling his blood as a cure all in 3rd world countries and he'll be Viagra's new spokesperson.
4. Flyers (2-2) previous 7th - There is something about putting on a Flyers jersey that makes a goalie become completely average. Say hello to mediocrity and fans hating you even when you win for the next 9 years Bryz.
5. Oilers (2-2) previous 14th - Quite literally Souray outscored 12 people on my team Sunday to beat me. Not he had more points then 12 people individually, but 12 people combined. I can't wait for him to fight Iginla and he breaks his hand on Iginla's face again.
6. Ducks (3-1) previous 11th - I'm glad I could play the mother figure that sent Karlsson off to become a man (norris trophy candidate) for another team. This just in Fleischman wasn't massively overpaid in real life and BeanTown practically stole that guy in our league.
7. Capitals (3-1) previous 2nd - Not really sure how they even lost a game, but fantrax says they have 80 more points than any other team. That must've been awful to see all those points sitting on your bench night after night.
8. Leafs (2-2) previous 3rd - Brian Burke's latest entry in his dream book went like this "Kessel is singing Born in America dressed in nothing but an American flag, scoring goals on Carey Price while skating on frozen bed of maple syrup". He woke up relieved he didn't throw away two 1st round picks for the first time in a long time.
9. Blues (2-2) previous 12th - Lundqvist is still the only player that likes winning on the Rangers. Don't drink the water in St. Louis as it predisposes people to concussions. And I thought the Penguins had bad luck with injuries.
10. Red Wings (2-2) previous 4th - A mash up of the best between the Red Wings and Islanders teams = a potent fantasy squad *revision* The first 2 weeks of the year.
11. Kings (2-2) previous 6th - A typical day for Drew Doughty. Receive a very large check from the Los Angeles Kings. Go skate around lethargically as you imagine yourself jumping into a pile of money like Scrooge McDuck. Snap back to reality as an opponent skates past you with the puck. Lucky for him Quick is.... quick.
12. Avalanche (2-2) previous 19th - Malkin is back!! Let the wins start pouring in like champagne off a playoff beard. Also, David Legwand has reached hockey maturity at the age of 31. When he dies he will be dissected to figure out what the hell took so long.
13. Penguins (1-3) previous 10th - They only have a wingers that can score goals. James *leopard seal* Neal and Marian *my groin feels tight* Gaborik
14. Canucks (2-2) previous 13th - They need to hire a psychiatrist, a mathematician, and an exorcist to figure out how 4 goalies can't produce as well as 2.
15. Sharks (3-1) previous 17th - FINALLY! Joe Paterno has got to quit, retire, get fired, go to jail to pave the way for Pavelski to use the nickname Joe Pa. Thornton shouldn't feel bad Heatly can't score with any All-Star center.
16. Canadiens (0-4) previous 15th - The Bulin Wall is back and no one likes being associated with a tragic period of time for the rest of their hockey career quite as much as ole Nikolai.
17. Sabres (2-2) previous 9th - Here is a riddle for you. Who, when playing 2nd line minutes doesn't play at all? Answer: Derek Roy
18. Stars (3-1) previous 16th - When you best player is 39 years old, Ray Whitney, and the game isn't golf you are in trouble.
19. Lightning (2-2) previous 18th - So many goalies, so little starting positions. Congrats on inheriting the 19th best team SplendidSplinter. May your reign be long and prosperous.
20. Flames (0-4) previous 20th - Ruggedly consistent, a bookend to this league just like the Hawks, except while the Hawks are a beautiful visage the Flames are..... not.
::
::
