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Fantasy Leagues => Dynasty NHL => NHL Leagues => Dynasty NHL: History => Topic started by: GypsieDeathBringer on December 05, 2011, 12:30:40 PM

Title: POWER RANKINGS 12/5/2011
Post by: GypsieDeathBringer on December 05, 2011, 12:30:40 PM
It has happened.... A new number 1! 

1. $Boston Bruins$ (6-2) previous 3 - All it took to bring the Bruins to first place was a historic month of averaging more than 4 goals a game and letting in under 2, also never losing in regulation.  They can keep up a pace like that right?  I will answer that, No.

2. $Hurricanes$ (5-3) still number 2 - Always the bridesmaid never the bride, second again.  You all just wait until Cam Ward stars in a documentary based on his recent life called "The Hangover; 2 months of mediocrity, The Cam Ward Story"  (they will clearly be sued based on naming rights). 

3. $Blackhawks (7-1) previously 1 - It has happened all those animal sacrifices I've been performing with my grandma have brought down the unbringdownable.  Only in this power rankings can you continue to win, have the best record and then be demoted to the 3rd best team.  I'm sure gocubsgo7 will use some kind of excuse like "all my goalies are injured or don't start anymore".  And I'd say, that is a pretty good excuse.

4. Oilers (4-4) previously 7 - I just read some article comparing the Oilers to the Penguins of a few years ago.  I'd say the big difference is the Penguins had a goalie worth talking positively about.  The only thing Khabibulin is going to win at his age is a drinking contest, and then proceed to get caught driving home after his victory to win something else, a DUI.  Luckily these fantasy Oilers have Pekka Rinne, well played sir, well played.

5. Red Wings (3-5) previously 4 - These fantasy Red Wings are going to start winning some games when they aren't playing the cream of the crop teams.  Until then keep your head up high and eyes forward.  If you do that you probably won't see Zetterberg crying on the floor of a cold shower pleading with the hockey gods to let him score a goal. 5 goals on 89 shots for a .05 shooting percentage will do that to any man. 
 
6. $Blues$ (5-3) previously 5 - He's back! David Perron, 1 game, 1 goal, on pace for like 60 goals now.  Hopefully his teammates learned their lesson and have stopped their post game ritual of pillow fights, or at least limit it to body shots only and no freezing them beforehand.

7. $Avalanche$ (5-3) previously 8 - Traded Chris Stewart to bring in Evgeni Malkin.  I feel like getting Malkin was a massive win, and I hate/respect you for it.  Just think of Camalleri starts to play like he has a pair this team could be as good as the Bruins.  Luckily for the rest of us Camalleri hasn't played like that since 3D movies still sounded awesome, i.e. 3 years ago.

8. $Ducks$ (6-2) previously 6 - Besides Eric Staal, Dubinsky has to be up there in biggest disappointments.  Rangers bring in a pass happy all-star center and Dubinsky responds with a wildly underwhelming 1 goal in 23 games.  Take that pride!

9. Flyers (2-6) previously 9 - This team has just been butchered by a buzz saw every single week.  They are currently getting the most fantasy points scored against them and not even by a little amount.  1360 against them and the next most points against is 1216 by the Red Wings.  May the tradition continue where the Flyers are besieged by potent fantasy clubs every week until we drive them into a mental breakdown.  The same breakdown Papps is going to have if Bryzgalov doesn't up his save % from .900, ouch.

10. Leafs (4-4) previously 11 - Leafs could be one of the top teams if they had 2 starting goalies.  In that vein I will trade Ondrej Pavelec, straight up, for Phil Kessel.  Eh? (small print of trade *any response by jmtrops is a binding agreement*)

11. Kings (4-4) previously 10 - If he was in  the political world Jonas Hiller would've commited political suicide by completely blaming his defense for him giving up 4 goals or more in half of the games this year.  The battle cry of Kaner! is becoming one of the few bright spots.  That and Quick is putting up identical numbers to Thomas' Vezina season last year.

12. Capitals (3-5) previously 14 - A brand spanking new coach and the same old stale game for the Capitals.  Ovechkin once considered the best player in the world isn't even the best player on his team anymore.  Nick Backstrom in the house wearing the man pants!

13. $Canucks$ (5-3) previously 18 - I didn't know Cory Schneider was a ginger and then I realized the Canucks are cursed.  Luongo is never going to win them a Stanley Cup, you know because he folds like fresh laundry under pressure, and does anyone else remember a ginger goalie hoisting the cup?  I don't even remember a ginger goalie....

14. $Stars$ (5-3) previously 15 - Tomas Kaberle might be the softest least physical hockey player since... any hockey player that just got knocked out and is falling to the ice.  A power play expert is currently captaining that Hurricanes power play to 28th in the league.  Solid. 

15. Sharks (4-4) previously 12 - Guillaume Latendresse life is Groundhog Day.  Another season of hockey another lingering, probably, season ruining injury.  And yet the Sharks plod along on the shoulders of young Derek Stepan.  10 years younger than Brad Richards, 7 million dollars cheaper, and only 7 points behind him.  Nice scouting Shelby.

16. Penguins (3-5) previously 17 - Crosby is back and this team starts its march to post season glory.  If I were a woman I'd kiss him right on the mouth.  Hell, If I were a little bit buzzed I'd kiss him right on the mouth.  God Bless America was actually written about Sidney Crosby.  Not the words so much, but the emotions.

17. Canadiens (3-5) previously 16 - It has got to be easy to be a sports writer in Montreal.  You just pull out the same story you've written about every year for the last 3 years "Andrei Markov will be missing time due to knee surgery".  Then sit back and sip on some hot cocoa while enjoying free health insurance.

18. Sabres (3-5) previously 13 - What wears blue and gold and is black and blue all over? Ryan Miller.  You can say what you want about the Lucic hit, but Miller got annihilated by Tootoo, on purpose.  If he doesn't get 5 plus games then they might as well just put goalies in a room with hungry dogs between periods to get them ready for the hurt of playing in the game. 

19. Lightning(2-6) previously 19 - How many stanley cups do you think Kiprusoff would have if he played with the Red Wings in the mid 2000's instead of Osgood?  Instead he has been the only reason the Flames are mediocre for the last 5 years.  Also where did Eric Nystrom come from?  He is going to have more goals in half of this season then the last 4 years combined.

20. Flames (1-7) previously 20 - At least Gilly knows when to tear down a dilapidated team and build it anew.  Your long journey starts one small victory at a time.... no matter how small or whatever that victory might be. 

Title: Re: POWER RANKINGS 12/5/2011
Post by: Rob on December 05, 2011, 12:44:30 PM
I'll cut the whole world in half for the #1 headband!   :bacon:
Title: Re: POWER RANKINGS 12/5/2011
Post by: BeanTown on December 05, 2011, 01:22:05 PM
Beauty as always!  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: POWER RANKINGS 12/5/2011
Post by: Anthony on December 05, 2011, 10:42:04 PM
"all my goalies are injured or don't start anymore".
:iatp: even my backup is injured now.